Diaper Diving

I got the biggest kick out of your comments on the post about the missing shoes, especially the variance within them. There are clearly two groups of people in the world: those who fear poop and those who are so far beyond the fear, they are numb to it.

I belong to the second group of people.

When faced with errant Polly shoes in a diaper of doo, I did what I never thought I'd do.

(Do. Doo. Doo-doo. Sorry. That's a lot of doo. I mean, do. I mean ... oh, never mind.)

I shut down my brain -- so I wouldn't have to acknowledge what was about to happen -- and turned off my texture receptors. Then I grabbed some extra diaper wipes, held my nose and grabbed those shoes out of the Pit of Poo-Poo.

I had to wait a few minutes, to quell the gags coming from the tips of my toes. Then I took the wipes to a sink and used LIBERAL amounts of soap and water -- like, Markos Moulitsas liberal -- to cleanse the shoes. I do believe they are the thickness of one layer of molecules now.

To answer your question, yes, Natalie knew where the missing shoes might reappear, and with her usual aplomb, merely shrugged at the information. Her only comment was that she really likes those purple cowboy boots.

But you better believe the Polly Pockets are nowhere NEAR the edge of Polly-land anymore. For now, we are keeping shoes on the feet and the diaper diving to a minimum.

Would this be a good time to tell you Teyla had corn for dinner?


If you're looking for more of Teyla's antics, be sure to read my 5 Minutes of Parenting post today. It involves Teyla dumping game pieces down the air vent in the kitchen, even as I'm trying desperately not to lose it. Lucky for her, she's both the saboteur and the savior in this story. Lucky for me, too.

Also? I didn't make the connection until now, but the title of the post is Do Over. Apparently, I have "do" on the brain. I can't imagine why.


  1. Having teenagers who handle their own bathroom needs is a blessed thing indeed.

    Loved the story of her starting everyone's day off on the wrong foot and then turning into Miss Sunshine.

    I'd leave a longer comment but I'm POOPed!

  2. have to laugh out loud....oh boy..


  3. This is funny stuff, even as I am slightly gagging over my morning coffee! I haven't had the fun of my girls that age in 24 years or so. Can I just tell you that you need to enjoy these stages? They go sooo fast. (Though I LOVE the getting close to 30 stage now, too!)

  4. My friends and I have a saying ... "There's ALWAYS corn" lol!

    hope you have a super DOOper day

  5. You are a better mom than I. Can we maybe super glue the shoes onto Polly?

  6. I am so immune to the horrors of poop now. The things that happen as we mother, eh?

  7. I saw the title of your post and thought "Oh no, you didn't."

  8. Very gross- but honestly- I probably would have done the same!! I think the OCD about toys must be a family thing- because I am the same way. I am completely obsessive about cleaning up Silas' toys each night and making sure they are all in their proper place. If something is missing (especially from the LIttle People sets)- the hunt begins... If I only I cared this much about keeping my house clean! :)

  9. Not completely numb to the poo here, but it's so commonplace it's acutally NORMAL. Look how far I've sunk :)

  10. I've heard of dumpster diving, but not diaper diving! That's great. I'm sure I would have done the same thing, especially if they were right there in plain view. :)

    Brings to mind a couple years ago, when my now-5-yr-old sneezed out this huge blob. I looked a little more closely and saw a pink high heel . I didn't know about Polly's or their shoes at that time--she'd been playing at her cousin's. I just thought, "where'd she ever get ahold of a shoe this small??" I think I washed it in case my niece was looking for it. :)

  11. Oh my word. That is so funny but I'm thinking I would've done much the same thing. I mean, after a little Clorox, who's the wiser? :-)