On Second Thought, I Should Just Be Glad He Didn't Like It

I was on the deck with Teyla yesterday afternoon, trimming back my cilantro, when I heard Connor messing around in the fridge.

"What do you need, buddy?" I called without turning around.

"I can't get the lid off this milk!" he answered.

"Just hang on a minute," I replied. "I'm almost done here. I can help you as soon as I come in."

Thirty seconds later, I walked into the kitchen to find a 4-ounce bottle of freshly pumped breast milk sitting on the counter -- with 2 ounces missing.

Connor was standing to the side with a guilty look on his face.

"Buddy, did you drink Teyla's milk?" I gasped.

He hung his head. "It tasted funny."

I didn't know whether to laugh or cry.

In the end, I chose laughter -- because Connor did enough crying for both of us. I hate to pump -- in fact, yesterday was the first time I've pumped since Teyla was born, and even that was only done because I want to start introducing a bottle to her so Corey and I can go on a date again this year. So I guess my startled reaction when I saw 2 precious ounces gone really threw Connor for a loop. I think his lip quivered for a full 30 minutes. He felt awful. And it truly wasn't his fault. He didn't even know what the little bottle was. It just looked interesting to him.

I guess it just illustrates the proverb: Don't cry over spilled milk. Unless it's breast milk. Then sob.


  1. ick. I was never one of those moms who could taste her own milk.

    Sorry you lost 2 ounces...I know how precious that stuff is!

  2. Oh my goodness I remember those days!! We went skiing once (with kids) and I had to pump for 2 weeks so there would be enough milk to leave with the "ski nursery" each day. We had to buy a special cooler to carry it in on the plane so it would remain frozen....
    At other times I remember having to pump in the car, in the bathroom at NFL football games.....In fact I figured out that I have nursed babies over 55 months of my life!! It is no wonder I have no pride left!!

    Thanks for the chuckle today!

  3. You just made my day!!!

    I feel bad for you, though. Really :-)

  4. Liquid gold, baby, liquid gold! We have yet to go on a date that has lasted more than 2.5 hours since Monkey got here! Awe, the bottle is a precious commodity.

  5. Ewwwww! Poor little fellow. Think how GROSSED out he'll be to remember this story when he's 16!!!

  6. Oh my. I can just hear that story being told when Connor's first child is born! And second. And third. . . I've read enough of your blog to know you and Corey will milk it for all it's worth!

    I wasn't endowed well enough to pump, which is just as well. Mine would drink anything but breast milk out of a bottle. It's like they recognized that the source and the substance didn't match.

  7. THAT is HI-larious! I always imagined that something like that might happen, but it never did in my house.

    We called it white gold.

  8. Too funny...that's a story to pull out at a VERY opportune time!

  9. Oh bless his heart. I never have tasted the stuff but I always thought mine looked a little funny.
    I bet he never does that again.

    Hope y'all have a great day!

  10. We called it liquid gold, and I still remember the tears when I dropped the first ounce of hard earned pumped milk down the sink. My Mom and I just stared and cried, then laughed... eventually!

  11. Hee hee. Thanks for the warning. When it's my turn to pump again, I'll remember to put it on the top shelf! :) I can picture it ending up on Bean's cereal, otherwise.

  12. His future girlfriends are going to adore you for recording (and later sharing) this moment!

  13. Oh, the breast pump! Those were the days!I always felt like a dairy whenever I hooked myself up. But keep on pumping, girl!Somethings are worth a good date with your husband.....if you get desperate, there's always formula. :)

  14. Oh you poor thing! :(

    And your poor son! Not because he drank the breast milk, but because he felt so bad.

  15. Oh my, I knew where that was going. Funny and not funny. I understand the not wanting to pump thing. I only do it every few weeks to ensure that my baby will continue to take a bottle.

  16. lol...that is so NOT FUNNY. NOT FUNNY. I can not laugh at that poor baby - but it's so hard.

    And believe me, from a pump-challenged mom, I know every ounce of that stuff is golden. I can understand your angst.

  17. Yikes! At least you didn't just lose 100+ ounces to a power outtage like I did this past weekend. Take care!

  18. Kelly! I'm catching up on commenting (AGAIN... I know...) and so wish I would've read this sooner. That is the funniest thing I've read in a long time.

    I'm with you... I hate pumping. But man, that is FUN-NY.