Irony is just honesty with the volume cranked up.
- George Saunders

1. My kids have been healthy all winter. Now that it's May and sunny and 70, they are sick. Natalie fell first. She got a medium-high fever last Friday with a side of sore throat. She was back to full strength by Tuesday. Which is when Connor turned ashen during his tumbling class. He threw up twice during dinner. Yesterday, he still had a fever, so he went to bed early. Natalie, meanwhile, sat in her bed until 9:00 PM, making up songs about believing on the Lord Jesus Christ and generally being cuter than a basket of fuzzy puppies.

2. Which is why Natalie was the one who woke me at 2:00 AM with a sweet whisper. "Mom, I just threw up." My first response was, "No you didn't. You're not sick. Are you sure?" Then I leaned closer and smelled her breath. She wasn't joking. (I'm a bit of an idiot when woken from the sleep of the zombies.)

3. When Connor was sick, I could tell when he was getting ready to blow, because his moaning and writhing would increase in intensity. Therefore, I always had a bucket ready for him. Natalie, apparently, has no such Emergency Broadcast System. So there was no bucket waiting for her.

4. Since Connor had a bucket, he threw up things like apples and water. Since Natalie had no bucket, she threw up everything she had eaten in the last 12 hours (shrimp, pasta, green beans, milk, chocolate pudding and carrots -- lots of carrots). I am now on hour 8 of "Mega-Hazardous Waste Clean-Up" and the 18-inch stain by the side of her bed is finally starting to fade.

5. I gag the gag of a thousand hypochondriacs when faced with the smell of vomit. Yet God made me a mother.

6. Because of the illness, both kids stayed home from school today. Which meant the two sick kids had to accompany me to Teyla's four-month well-baby check-up. Which means I took my last remaining healthy child to the doctor so she could get shots, be cranky and run a fever.

7. After the doctor's appointment, the kids decided they felt good enough to eat lunch. They requested microwavable mac and cheese. Which smells like vomit to me.

8. I had all kinds of goals for this week. I've accomplished very few of them. Which is probably why God had me read this quote Sunday night: "I have always been complaining that my work was constantly interrupted, until I slowly realized that my interruptions were my work." (Out of the Solitude, Henri Nouwen)


  1. I need to write that quote down myself...I'm sorry your babies are sick.:(

    Praying that they get well soon, and that mac and cheese will no longer smell like vomit to you.:)

    God Bless,

  2. The barfing sickness...I feel for makes me dry-heave to think about it :)

    Hope EVERYONE starts feeling better soon!

  3. Oh, I hate vomit! I hope the puke bug is gone soon...

  4. Oh, YUCK. It's just not right to be sick in the spring!

    Great quote!!

  5. I think I would have skipped that doctor's appointment, myself.

  6. First off, love the irony quote. I'm currently living that one. Second, whoa, friend, very sorry to hear the bugs that have taken hold. Third, will be praying that the storm begins to subside.

  7. I'm so sorry! I don't do vomit well at all, either, so I feel for you contending with 2 at a time.

    That quote is awesome. I'm going to have to commit that one to memory and pull it out when the interruptions start piling up. Which would be every day, right? :)

  8. Oh yuck. Stomach bugs are the very worst. I am so so sorry. (fyi_I added you to my blogroll)

  9. Oh my, what a week. Hope everyone feels better.

    I loved the quote at the end. So true and yet so hard to remember. I posted about something similar today.

  10. ummm... yuck. What a week for you!

    Hoping everyone heals...

  11. My middle one just got done with three days of puking.... and now after reading this, it might be my turn to be sick. ;-)

    Seriously. I'm still waiting for the rest of the Fam to get sick, which I really pray doesn't happen. Same with you, I really hope you don't get it!

  12. I gag the gag of a thousand hypochondriacs when faced with the smell of vomit.

    LOVED this! Made me laugh.

    I am so sorry for the sickness and resulting clean-up. Yuck! May you all be on the mend and vomit-free very soon.

  13. I'm sorry you've had a rough week! I hope everyone feels better soon!

  14. I don't know how you can make even throwing up seem funny.

    As long as it's in your house. Far far away in the north, of course!

    I'd rather deal with fever and sore throat for a week than a 24 hour stomach bug - in my kids or me.

  15. Oh girl! If I lived next store I would so be over there helping you clean up. I just wanted you to know that.
    One of my super powers is that I have an iron stomach and things like blood and vomit don't phase me. I just get in the zone and kinda tune it out of my consciousness altogether making me a great friend to have when you are dealing with the more precarious side of kids. :)
    I would have made a great nurse in another life.
    Thanks for reading my blog. Your comments always make me smile and I genuinely look forward to them!
    Hang in there!

  16. Awww..hope the babies are feeling better and that you get that funky stain out of the carpet.

    I also agree that microwave mac n cheese smells like vomit. Just don't smell their breath after they eat it and maybe you'll be okay..:))

    With much love and compassion...

    Lisa :)

  17. Yikes. I remember when 3 or 4 of my kids and I got some stomach thing. I just made pallets on the floor for us all and each had an empty cool whip tub. I can't even look at cool whip now.

  18. Been there. Done that. More times that I care to count. When I get to heaven I want to ask why the stomach virus ALWAYS hits in the dead of night?

  19. I can't believe I missed all this! I leave the blogging world for a few days and it all falls apart. Sheesh...

    Elliot once got sick and then was better, and I let him drink an Orange Fanta (orange soda pop). How I lived to rue that decision.

    Glad that everyone's feeling better.

  20. Oh, I love that last quote. I've not heard it, but have been thinking so much of that lately. I should blog about it.

    We've had massive puking here too. I think we're finally done (famous last words). I should blog about it.

    I hope all is well now and you are enjoying the nice weather!