I Give Up

I've been working on a post -- a real post that involves thought and editing and reflection and humor -- for five days now.

Five. Days.

What I've learned is this -- I'm not going to have the time to write those types of posts for the next six months to 16 years, give or take. Not without staying up really late, anyway, and that annoys my husband, who would apparently like to see me every once in a while. Go figure.

So here begins a new beginning. And it's so fitting -- whoa, am I rhyming genius today or what? -- because it was one year ago yesterday that I ventured into this here blogging world. (Original post here.)

I am now going to enter the world of the short post. The "I just thought of this" post. The "what a great picture I have to share this" post. The "I'm typing this off the top of my head" post. The "I could really use a professional editor right now because I'm way off topic" post.

See? I'm doing it right now. Can you feel the love?

So here's a quick update on my world:

Teyla -- she's growing up much too fast. Much. Too. Fast.

I've got pictures to prove it, too. (More on Teyla to come; I have a feeling this new, breezy style of blogging will lend itself to baby updates.)

My family -- we're in South Carolina right now, visiting my in-laws who flee here every winter. I can see why.

Me (and here's the pressing issue for today) -- I'm almost six weeks postpartum. I saw my doctor last week before we left Minnesota, and lo, she pronounced me good. My weight is at the same poundage as it was when I was 24 weeks pregnant. (When I looked like pretty much like this.)

So why is it that I wouldn't be able to get into that outfit today even if I was assisted by bacon grease and a shoehorn?!? It's like my body has declared a civil war on itself, and the weight has taken sides -- to the north and to the south -- and it's left a no-man's land of flappy skin in the middle.

And seriously -- has anyone seen Jennifer Lopez lately? Because I'm pretty sure I have something of hers.

Baby got back.

Connor is four-point-five years old already, which means I'm way out of the statue of limitations for having to remember what happened after the last pregnancy. So I turn to you, my loyal and wise blogging friends, to fill me in.

Is this normal? Does one's postpartum body always redistribute fat cells like a crazy host on HGTV's "Freestyle"? And if so, does one give in and buy a new "first year post baby" wardrobe to get through the transition? Because I miss wearing shirts that don't make me look like a Hollywood starlet and pants that have a real waistband with snaps and zippers and everything..

Now see? Aren't you glad that I'm going to be posting more riveting stuff like this? And more often, too? Hang on to your pants, ladies and gentlemen. Especially if you're wearing jeans with elastic waists. It's about to get funky.


  1. Oooh, I'm the wrong person to ask about this. After Bub was born, things seemed to evolve in a predictable way: I lost most of my baby weight after three months, and then when I stopped breastfeeding things were basically back to normal - there were changes, but they weren't dramatic ones, and I was fitting into all my old clothes again.

    After the Pie was born, though? Completely different story. My weight is distributed VERY weirdly, and not at all in the way it was before I had my babies. I've gradually replaced all my clothes and let go of the idea that things would somehow get back to normal. Sigh.

  2. Girl, I've got 10 pounds per baby stuck on me! If you do the math that's an extra 40 pounds that have redistributed themselves all over my five foot frame! Yikes!
    And I can't use the excuse that I am 16 years post pardom .... it doesn't fly with anyone anymore!
    I think that being 37 also has alot to do with it. Not only do I have extra pounds on me, but now they are old and very set in their ways!
    I'm determined to lose 40 by 40 though! I'll be 38 in March, so I've got 2 years to do it in. Twenty pounds a year for the next two years sounds completely do-able doesn't it? :)
    Oh and I just gotta say, that baby is soooooooooo adorable!!!

  3. Well, see, I did things backwards when I was pregnant & afterwards. I was so very sick when I was pregnant that I ended up giving birth at 50 pounds less than when I conceived. (Yes, 50. Pounds.) Then, after she was born, I felt fantastic, but wasn't able to nurse...I found that 50 pounds again! Plus ten or so!


  4. I lost all of my weight after baby #1 and baby #2, but baby #3 will be six years old soon, and I still have 5-10lbs of her left on my hips.

    You'll get there...it just takes time and patience. I think it makes a difference being able to get outside too. Weight tends to come off a little slower when it's cold and wintry outside. I just think we're all more active in the summer.

    Hang in there! And your baby is adorable!

  5. I don't have any kids, so I can't help you with the weight distribution thing. (But my weight seems to redistributing itself even so. EEK!)

    I tend to be a "short blogger," too. It can be fun! :)


  6. Remember, Kelly, that it took nine months to put that weight on. Give yourself at least 9 to take it off! Or better yet, 18! =)

  7. I was flat-out astonished to find that after my third baby, when I FINALLY hit my pre-pregnancy weight, things just did not look the same. At all.

    I distinctly remember looking into the mirror and saying (aloud) "And WHOSE hips do YOU belong to?" They never answered me, those sassy, stubborn hips. But they're still here.

    By the way, wherever on earth your in-laws place is in South Carolina...it is stunning.

    And Teyla is just a-growin'. She looks like she's just clinging to you in the picture. What a precious angel.

    As for the short posts, hey, when in Rome...(or when in postpartum brain-fog...same thing...) LOL

  8. Your blog posts are highly anticipated--short or long. I think it will be fun to get your quick thoughts!

    I truly remember my daughter being 4 years (not months) old and blaming something on my baby weight. A friend stared at me and said, "She's 4."
    I'm not sure what her point was...

    And. Have you seen J Lo lately? She's got plenty of back going on with those twins. I'm not thinkin' she's misplaced a thing.

    Enjoy your beautiful escape in South Carolina!!

  9. I kept 5 pounds after each kid. That's 15 of those unwanted suckers. And my feet grew one/half size with each one, too.

    And that's ALL I have to say about that.

  10. are you kidding? i still have a squishy middle. my baby is 3.

  11. Well of course posts about jeans and their assorted fasteners will be RIVETing!! (sorry, never can resist! gonna be blocked one of these days, I just know it!)

    Baby #1 was sensitive to all milk products while I nursed (which I did for 10 months) so wow, cutting out cheese, milk, chocolate, etc. really made the pounds melt away. (Of course, now same child guzzles milk by the gallon. Go figure.)

    Baby #2? Nary a problem. AND then I turned 40. AND take a couple of medications. Now I'm longing for my college days when I used to TRY to gain weight.

    Oh yeah, and a 1/2 shoe size per kid for me too.

    If you need more "encouragement," just holler. I'm always happy to help. :-)

    And Teyla is STILL a doll!! And worth every ounce!

  12. Seems to me that thought, editing, reflection and certainly humor were all well contained in that post--still chuckling! And what's my excuse for baby fat when the baby is six years old? Maybe the cheesecake squares I won't keep my hands off? Hang in there, friend.

  13. De-lurking to say, yeah, after the second (or third or 4th) if you aren't a 26 year old gym-o-holic (like some of the twinkies in my mommy group) it does redistribute. Greatly. I bought a few Wal-mart pieces to tide me over and some of the "redistributed stuff" went away and some well, let's just say there are some capris that will never work in this house again!

  14. OH yeah...I think the redistribution is normal.
    And my excuse is that I'm a mom of twins--so what if they are going to be 11 soon? (I'm in total denial about that, btw)
    And posting at all with a newborn is impressive--don't worry about length. I don't have a newborn myself, yet my posts have been few and far between lately.

  15. I'm pretty sure you don't want to hear about how much weight I lost after having Baby Bug. *wink*

    However, I'm sure you look absolutely great!

  16. I don't know what to tell you about the body thing. My body hasn't been the same since baby 1.

    I will say that we have almost the exact same kitchen. I was looking at your picture and I thought, that looks like my kitchen. Seriously, same color cabinets, same exact stove, I think the dishwasher might be the same as well, and the countertops are really similar, too. Only difference? Wall color, but I have that color in the bedroom. Our builders must have been twins separated at birth ;-)

  17. I am one of those that buys a post baby wardrobe to get me through the transition. I just can't bear to wear to maternity clothes any longer after the baby is born. I have clothes ranging from a size 15 to a size 6!

    Good luck. The after baby body is eeeeevil!

  18. Oh I hear you, the ONLY part of my body that I thought was proportioned correctly before getting pregnant was my chest (if you'll forgive me getting a little personal) and then after the baby it's like even that got ruined. Dropped straight to my thighs or something so now I'm sad there too as well. What I haven't done for those kids :)

    And cute picture of Teyla btw.

  19. yikes. I concur. Prepregnancy weight just doesn't look the same after. Hang in there, though. You're really beautiful. :o)

  20. You will get there; warmer weather makes a world of difference. Patience, patience, patience is the key. I had a tumor post-pregnancy and lost my weight really quickly. My sister often commented after her second child that she wished she had a tumor that would suck the weight off of her. Wrong solution, sis, I told her. Anyway, Teyla is beautiful, I love all the posts you put out there and the body will return in it's own time!

  21. Oh, ramble on, friend! That was a fun post. Maybe not as thought-provoking as some you've done, but just as laugh worthy. You could write a bunch of nonsense in Turkish and I'd still giggle and be a devoted reader.

    Teyla's just a doll and makes any leftover weight well worth it. You'll be back to your old self before you know it. Your other two personal trainers will see to it, rest assured.

  22. I just love reading your blogs! And those short rivetings posts are the best kind. They are pretty much the only kind I write because I have a 4 and 2 year old! That's all we've got time for, girlfriend!

    Teyla is beautiful!

  23. I wasn't going to buy any transition clothes because I was going to lose the weight quickly. After 2 or 3 weeks postpartum my maternity jeans were falling off (I got up to 45 inches around while pregnant) and my regular jeans weren't fitting yet. So, I bought two pairs of really dark blue stretchy jeans in a big size and said "these won't fit me for very long!" Well, Jordan is three months now, and those jeans still fit really great :(

  24. Ok, here is how it works with me.

    Nine months on, nine months off is true true true. I really really exercised this last time and just, nothing was happening. But then, when Ike turned 9 months, most of it just faded away.

    But, my body is in no way like it was before I had kids. Partly cuz of pregnancy, partly because I am a LOT older now. My butt is definitely bigger, but the husband says better. And the girls are BIGGER. Yes, it's true.

    You will get back to a body mostly comparable to where you were. But, it probably won't happen till the fall.

    Dang, no string/thong bikinis this summer!! Whatever will you wear??

  25. PS - my first blog, I posted twice in a year. They were deep, soul searching posts. A whopping two of them.

    Finally I had this epiphany: "I am not going for the Pulitzer Prize here. It's a BLOG."

    And, the rest is verbose and mostly fluffy history.

  26. What a sweetheart!

    And yes, nothing will ever be the same again. And that includes your body.

    But it's worth it.

    Even three times over (or four in my case, so don't limit yourself! ha!).